Harriette Cole: I can’t get my home organized. What am I doing wrong?

Harriette Cole: I can’t get my home organized. What am I doing wrong?

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m eager to reorganize and declutter my living space. However, I have tried to do this in the past and have never been successful.

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What practical steps or approaches can I take to efficiently reorganize, purge belongings and create a more serene environment without feeling overwhelmed by the process?

— Declutter

DEAR DECLUTTER: I will first say that this is a weak area for me as well, but I am happy to share what I have been taught.

Select one room to start. Break the room down into areas to tackle — areas small enough to manage in a short period of time. Make a list of what you intend to do, one area at a time. As you accomplish a small task, check it off. This will give you motivation to move on to the next task.

Give yourself a goal — perhaps completing five tasks each day. Congratulate yourself as you complete projects.

Be sure that throwing things away or giving them to others is a big part of your regular plan. You have to eliminate things from your life to be successful at decluttering.

An expert on the topic, Marie Kondo, has written a dozen books about organization, including her first, “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up,” that provides detailed strategies on creating a healthy relationship between yourself and things that you should let go.

Stop buying things. Once you get your space under control, it’s easiest to keep it that way if you don’t add to your environment. Resist the temptation to bring anything extra into your space. Learn to appreciate less.

DEAR HARRIETTE: The holiday season serves as a stark reminder of the physical distance between my family and me. The absence of close familial connections during this time often evokes feelings of longing and nostalgia.

How can I honor the holiday spirit and create meaningful experiences despite the geographical separation, ensuring that I feel connected and emotionally fulfilled during this time?

— Lonely Times

DEAR LONELY TIMES: Being far away from family can create a heightened ache during this season when so many people travel to be with each other.

The good news is that most of us use technology now to connect. Schedule video chats with your family members. If you do that already, increase the frequency during this time. Be honest and share that you are lonely and truly miss them.

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Offer to do fun things together over the phone, like cooking a meal or playing a game. Sometimes my sister, niece and I hop on a call and just chat about the simplest of things for hours just to be together — and we live many hours away from each other.

Create family within your local community. Identify people who are already friends, and spend time with them. Look to see who else you might add to the fold. Open your eyes and notice the people in your environment.

It is heartwarming to have loved ones nearby when you need a hug or just want to be in someone’s company in person. Cultivate those bonds, too, and your loneliness may dissipate.

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.